The challenge is in determining when to listen to fear, and when to ignore it. Fear’s insidiousness hides on the the invisible line between what’s healthy and what isn’t. Fear makes us do the opposite of what’s best for usĪs with stress and other “negative” emotions, a certain amount of fear is healthy, even beneficial. I’m now able to listen to birth stories without passing out, and my goal is to work my way up to giving blood. (Shoutout to all the undergrad psych majors, heyyy.) Turns out it’s a diagnosable phobia with a name and the treatment - surprise! - is exposure therapy. I’d always thought “well, that’s a bummer, but that’s just the way it is” - until my teammate/good pal Leah suggested it sounded like a vasovagal response. My body literally shuts down and goes night-night not only when something hurts, but when I’m thinking about something that hurts. For most of my life I’ve been so averse to pain that shots, blood draws, ear piercings, and even stories about extreme pain make me faint. who have an outsized fear response to ordinary stimuli. Related: How to Break Your Worst Work HabitsĪnd speaking of doing things that scare you, can I get vulnerable with y’all for a minute? I’m one of the ~ 19 million people in the U.S. Another experiment showed clinical and statistically significant improvements among participants given exposure therapy in the treatment of spider phobia. One study, for example, found that patients with claustrophobia who were treated with exposure therapy showed that 79 percent improved to a clinically significant extent, versus 18 percent in the control group. But confronting it is the way to move forward. Fear doesn’t ever really go away, nor should it. Susan Jeffers recommends you think through the outcome that makes you most afraid, so that you can then consider how you would deal with it were it to happen. In her 1987 bestseller Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway, Dr. It’s an approach long favored by behavioral psychologists. And the best results that I've had in life, the most enjoyable times, have all been from asking a simple question: What’s the worst that can happen?” More often than not it shows you exactly what you should do. Sometimes it shows you what you shouldn’t do. “Fear is your friend,” says Tim Ferriss in his TED talk. Such an efficacious outlook produces personal accomplishments, reduces stress and lowers vulnerability to depression.īut how can you set yourself up for an “efficacious outlook” to begin with, so the flywheel spins the way you want it to? Think through the worst-case scenario They approach threatening situations with assurance that they can exercise control over them. They attribute failure to insufficient effort or deficient knowledge and skills which are acquirable. They quickly recover their sense of efficacy after failures or setbacks. They heighten and sustain their efforts in the face of failure. They set themselves challenging goals and maintain strong commitment to them. Such an efficacious outlook fosters intrinsic interest and deep engrossment in activities.
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